Sunday 28 June 2009

Even with only two kids in the house,

I still get this ...

funny pictures of cats with captions
see more Lolcats and funny pictures

Bradley is at a sleepover and as a result, Alex is all hyped up with no-one to annoy except for Andrew. Oh joy!!

Monday 22 June 2009

Dear Donna,

Hi there! It's your old friend, the Universe, here to welcome you to another week of fun-filled lunacy.

I love watching you on mornings like these when you sleep in .. some of the things you do make me laugh! For instance, did you realise that you have made three cups of coffee this morning and yet haven't managed to drink a single one? The fact that you then made the second and third cups and put them down in the same location as the other one, then absent-mindedly picked up the first (very cold) cup to take a sip out of was hilarious, as was the look on your face!

Congratulations for getting the children to school on time, dressed in the right uniforms and sort-of awake but I will have to deduct points for the fact that you managed to forget two out of three school bags and thereby forgetting two out of three lunches. You really did need that second trip to school to remind you to get petrol though, so I suppose it's all worked out in the end.

On the topic of petrol, it would probably be a good idea to check the fuel gauge more than once a week now that you're driving a much bigger and thirstier car, especially seeing as the other car is filled with donations to charity and you have about as much chance of fitting the kids into that car as you do of fitting into your year 12 Graduation Dinner dress. Having bits sticking out the sides of the dress isn't actually illegal (though it definitely should be!) whereas having parts of the children sticking out of the car is illegal and possibly just a teensy-weensy bit dangerous. Just think of the damage to the paintwork and the upholstery if the children manged to bleed all over it; not to mention the cost of buying one-armed uniform blazers and one-legged uniform trousers.

Now I realise you have a busy week ahead of you, with the tiler doing both bathrooms and the new robe going into Alex's bedroom, but you need to make time for that wonderful thing called relaxing. You have only managed to read 6 books in the last 4 days so you're falling a bit behind. The housework can wait until you catch up. Another week won't really hurt anything will it? With the tiler being there, you won't need to do the bathrooms and I'm sure you can put the slaves, oops I mean children, to work doing the dishes. They dirty more of them than you do after all! So what if there's more of them .. put them to work I say!

Anyway, I had better be off for now to check on some of the other inhabitants of Earth or they may start getting jealous that I only seem to talk to you. Not everyone has voices in their heads to keep them company like you do! Just remember to check with another human before doing anything the voices tell you to or we may have all sorts of issues ... again!

Take care (and your happy pills!)

Love from,
The Universe

Sunday 21 June 2009

Random thoughts..


  • Why do children only play with a toy when you threaten to throw it out?

  • Why do children's bedroom floors and dirty clothing have such a magnetic attraction happening? Has the earth's magnetic field changed and someone forgot to tell me?

  • Where did all this 'stuff' in my house come from?

  • If the world spun in the opposite direction, would those of us who are right-handed switch to being left handed and vice versa?

  • How come it's so hard for us to train the dog, but very easy for him to train us?

  • Do our children think we're really that stupid?

Saturday 20 June 2009

Friday fill ins #129

1. All children alarm their parents, if only because you are forever expecting the worst!

2. Show me a good loser and I will show you a person who was raised right.

3. Asking your children to cook you dinner is like eating an entire box of chocolate liqueurs at one time ... seems like a good idea at the time but ends up making you feel sick!

4. Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy covering their backsides and lining their pockets.

5. I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine the demands of housework and having some me time.

6. It is impossible to think of any good meal, no matter how plain or elegant, without salt or veggies in it.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to sleep; tomorrow my plans include finalising the tile selection and Sunday, I want to sleep some more!

Wednesday 17 June 2009

Family news from the past week ..

I survived the '12th birthday movie night sleepover party' (obviously!) without too much damage. Andrew had a great birthday and a great party, even if he did come down to the lounge room and sit with me for a while because "they're all soooo noisy that I have a headache!" and that was with only three extra boys in the house.

After shifting some furniture in Alex's bedroom, I discovered our shower is leaking into his wall again., so now we're up for the cost of fixing that. Luckily, Peter was in the mood to fix it properly by re-tiling the whole shower instead of just patching it, so now I get to go pick out new tiles and try to arrange a reasonable quote for the labour involved.

I also managed to get him to agree to getting an electrician in to fix the dodgy front light and install another one. I thought I was on a roll until I figured out why he was being so reasonable ...
I bought food for the family on the weekend.

This is what Peter bought on the weekend ..


He's been wanting another bike for a while and now that we actually have a car (or three!) to transport the kids in, I don't really have a problem with him having it. He is careful, always wears the right protective gear and deserves some fun. The look on his face when he got off after riding it home was priceless. His grin nearly split his face in half! For those who want the details it's a Kawasaki Vulcan VN800 Cruiser. A cruiser is much better for a ride in the country on a fine afternoon than a sports bike. Only problem is that with his matt black helmet, now he really looks like a bikie.

Andrew went off to his year 7 camp on Monday. This will be the longest he's been away from home without one of us there with him. He's my little stress head, so he was a bit worried about the whole thing but found a kindred spirit in one of the kids who came to his birthday party, Nik, who was a bit concerned as well. They agreed to sit together on the bus for the 5 hour trip to Albany and help each other out. I think they'll both be so busy, they won't have time to feel homesick but it's good to know someone has his back. Andrew even deigned to give me a hug good-bye, after looking around and checking out what the other boys were doing of course!

Alex is in trouble again for not handing in homework that I know he's done at least part of. I have told his teachers that I refuse to put my entire life on hold to stand over him for hours on end, but some of them still don't seem to realise that getting him to think in abstract terms is like trying to milk a bull .. now matter how long and hard you try, it just isn't going to work! Mind you, the communication between the teachers and myself has improved greatly from last year so at least I'm able to suggest alternatives to tasks that are going to be too far outside the realms of reasonable expectation. I know you shouldn't wish your life, or your child's life, away but I can't wait until high school is over!!

Bradley has been wandering the house like a little lost soul without Andrew here. Apparently it's no fun to play the Wii by himself so the dog is getting a lot of extra attention and loving it!

Now I'm off to contact some more tilers so I can try to work out if the first quote is good, bad or indifferent. Wish me luck ...

Monday 15 June 2009

Manic Monday #172

What is the last song that was stuck in your head and how did you get rid of it?
Don't know if it counts as a song as such, but the Imperial March from Star Wars. Alex has been humming it on and off for the past couple of weeks and it keeps popping into my head at the weirdest times. This time I managed to get rid of it by testing Bradley on his times tables.

If you had to say what one thing in your life best represents your freedom, what would it be?
Tricky one, this. Freedom from what exactly? Political oppression, depression, prison, pain? I'm going to take it in the political sense and say my freedom of speech. I can openly say I disagree with the government or spiritual leaders (or both) and not be afraid for my safety.

If you were invited to the White House for dinner tonight, what would you wear from your current wardrobe?
Considering the flight I would have to take to get there .. probably comfy jeans or dressy trousers with one of the three tops that still fit me.

Saturday 13 June 2009

Friday fill ins #128

1. I grew up thinking that my parents had it easy. All they had to do was go to work and boss us around. Boy, was I wrong!!

2. Lee's blog was the last website I was at before coming here.

3. Why don't you do what you want to do; be who you want to be?

4. Reading helps me relax.

5. Thanks for the comments.

6. I find rudeness and bad body odour very off-putting.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to dinner out with some of the Big W girls; tomorrow my plans include food shopping and going with the flow and Sunday, I want to clean up the carports as well as relax!

Wednesday 10 June 2009

To all the non-scrapbookers out there ...

.. please, please, please write details on the back of your photos.

A date ..

A place ..

A name ..

.. will help the people who come after you to know more, understand more, of your life and the reasons why you took the photos you did.

I have been sorting through one of the three boxes of photos, albums and framed pictures that belonged to Peter and Mark's Dad. So many photos with no details, dates, place names or, worst of all, people's names, means so many memories lost.

Admittedly, a lot of the photos would probably only mean something to Neil or Anne as they are of trips they took together but even still, they are a part of their life and I hate to see them just languishing in a box with no idea of the who, what or where.

Hopefully we will be able to identify details of some of these photos but even if we don't, please make sure this doesn't happen to your memories.

A Bradley funny ..

Driving home from school on Monday, Bradley was rather quiet in the back of the car, when all of a sudden he pipes up with:

"Mum, what's a bee-ow?"

"A what?"

"A bee-ow or maybe a bee-oo."

"I have no idea. Spell it."

"B-e-a-u."

"Oh, that's said 'bo' and it means a suitor or boyfriend."

At this point he started laughing almost hysterically.

"What's so funny?"

"The ute that just went past does repairs on boyfriends! That's funny!"

I looked for the ute in question and sure enough it was a Beaurepaires ute. (For those who don't know, Beaurepaires is a tyre outlet here in WA.) More laughter ensued until ...

"Why would you repair a boyfriend Mum? If they're broken wouldn't you just get a new one?"

It really is a throwaway society isn't it?

Monday 8 June 2009

Manic Monday #171

If you joined the circus, what act would you most want to perform?
Juggler/knife thrower because if I were able to do those, it would mean I had decent hand-eye co-ordination!

Would you generally be overdressed or under dressed at a party?
Depends on the season but probably under dressed. I am not a fashionista by any stretch of the imagination so always find it difficult to work out what to wear to events.

Do you feel that children should be sheltered from unhappiness?
No. I believe children should be taught that all emotions are OK and that bad times/feelings will happen in their lives, but they should be guided in how to deal with their emotions. For example, just because you're feeling bad doesn't mean you can take it out on someone else.

Sunday 7 June 2009

Today ..

.. I have achieved the following:
  • restrained myself from killing Alex 10 times (that's an improvement on the 23 times of yesterday!)
  • paid 9 bills (and we all know that there will be at least 9 more by the end of next week!)
  • listened to the dog bark at the birds in the trees out the back 8 times (I'm sure the neighbours are going to either report him to the council or try to kill him soon.)
  • told Bradley to clean up his room 7 times (and then gave up!)
  • done 6 loads of washing (most of it from the floor in Bradley's room.)
  • vacuumed mulch off my carpet 5 times (damn dog thinks that the big bits of decomposing garden mulch are the best thing to chew inside. Apparently it's not as much fun to chew them outside!)
  • done 4 lots of dishes (how is that possible when we haven't even had dinner yet?)
  • tried to scrap 3 times (but didn't succeed at all. Mojo? Whatever I did, I'm sorry! Please come home ... please?)
  • Read 2 books (you know you're getting desperate for something to read when you raid the kids' library bags!)
  • Fell asleep in my lounge chair (my 'throne') 1 time (and woke to find one of my lovely children, Drew, had covered me with a doona so I "wouldn't get too cold to make dinner"!)

What did you get up to today?

Friday 5 June 2009

Friday fill ins #127

1. Love makes a house a home.

2. My favorite thing for dinner lately has been whatever takes the least amount of time to make.

3. As much as I love our dog, all he seems to do lately is bark! bark! bark!

4. A nice long walk would probably be a good idea but I really can't be bothered right now.

5. Sometimes, all you want to hear is some good news.

6. When all is said and done, we are all responsible for own actions, so why can't some people accept that fact and just get on with it?

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to having 3 extra 12 year-old boys in the house for Andrew's birthday/movie night/sleepover party; tomorrow my plans include recovering from aforementioned birthday party/sleepover and Sunday, I want to scrap!

Thursday 4 June 2009

Whoever invented the recorder ..

should be hung, drawn, quartered, and then set on fire for good measure!

I can handle listening to just about any other instrument being played by an inexperienced learner. (Except a violin .. that always sounds like someone is trying to pluck the hairs out of a very delicate area .. one at a time .. with a blowtorch. Either that or a cat being stretched and strangled at the same time!)

I try to be supportive and appreciative of the child's efforts. (Although the expression on my face probably gives away what I'm really thinking .. "And just what, exactly, have my eardrums ever done to you?")

I realise that it is probably the cheapest and simplest instrument available to teach whole classes of children at a time. (Though the plastic they make them out of now doesn't seem to be nearly as hardy as it used to be. There was a time when you could use them as a handy substitute for a hammer without inflicting too much damage whereas now, you can barely play them normally without something falling apart.)

I know that children, whilst being the apple of their parents' eyes, can be somewhat difficult to deal with in large groups (kind of like wildebeest, or for that matter, just about any other wild beast I suppose), but how does giving them the power to inflict mental anguish and hearing loss on anyone within hearing range improve the situation at all?

I can understand that primary school music teachers have probably lost certain pitches of hearing from being repeatedly exposed to such a monstrous instrument, but I ask you, is that any reason to try to ensure that the parents of their students lose those same pitches of hearing?

So whilst I can sympathise with the plight of the primary school music teacher, I ask you all to join me in getting these abominations banned! All in favour .. say aye.


What?


You'll have to speak up.


I can't hear you!


Does anyone know sign language?


Oh .. I give up! I'll be hiding as far away as I possibly can, trying to stop the flow of blood from my ears. Send me a telegram when he's finished practising please ....

Tuesday 2 June 2009

Manic Monday #169

Another writing prompt along the lines of Friday fill-ins. Here goes...

Imagine you're packing a picnic lunch. What would be in your basket?
Fruit (grapes, watermelon, mandarins), fresh bread rolls, BBQ chicken, Edam cheese, cold water with lots of ice.

If your life were a weather vane, which direction would it be pointing right now?
No one particular direction. Just going with the flow ...

What's something that people do in traffic that really annoys you?
Tailgating, failing to indicate, cutting other people off and why is it that people think the glass in their car windows is one-way glass? I can see you when you decide to pick your nose at the traffic lights, you gross individual!!

Monday 1 June 2009

Debbie's Delightful Cards

I went to Debbie's first card-making class on Saturday and look what we did:


When I saw the colours we were working with, I have to admit I wasn't all that keen on them. Orange and green are not usually colours I would put together because I'm more of a blues and greens person. Once we'd made the first card though, I was hooked! I'm really pleased with how they turned out and can see so many possibilities for cards and scrapbook page decorations.

Deb was great as a teacher, so patient and easy-going, but I only have one complaint .. she's introduced me to inking and now I want all the different colours! Oh the choices .. where do I start?