Nostalgic mood is now kicking in

We are starting to move house today and I am feeling ever-so-slightly unsettled. We have been in this house for ten years and I, for one, am going to miss it.

When I told Peter that I was feeling 'fragile', he replied "the day has arrived and it's time to evacuate." (sounds like an emergency drill not house move!) then said "we didn't conceive any children here but it has been a good house."

We may not have conceived any children here (thank goodness .. three is enough!) but the ones we had already have changed so much in the past ten years that it seems like an entire lifetime ago that I was stressing about the last move.

A few of the big events from the last ten years that jump to mind:

• My Dad passing away six months after we moved in. I'll always remember the conversations we had when we were painting the boys rooms and my grudging acceptance of his near-enough attitude to cutting in. He was right .. it doesn't really matter in the long run.
• The boys all starting 'big' school. They've all grown up way too quickly!
• Alex being diagnosed with autism. I can still remember coming home from a very unproductive meeting at his school and standing in the carport crying on Peter's shoulder about all my fears for him and his future.
• The births of Mark and Bec's children. So wonderful to see them become a family of four and then five and it really didn't hurt that they're all cute!
• The horrible phone call in the middle of the night to let me know that Pete's Dad had passed away. It felt like Pete was on the other side of the world even though he was only 700km away and all I wanted to do was to bring him home and make the pain go away.
• All of the other seemingly small moments that added up to a sometimes painful, yet still wonderful, ten years.

Apparently that's enough reminiscing for now as we have boxes to move and 'stuff' to sort. The slave driver awaits ...

Andrew wants to die a slow painful death ...

or maybe that's just my interpretation of the way he keeps reminding me of my, in his opinion, extremely advanced age.

Example one:

"I'll help you set up your sewing machine Mum. I know how to thread them and everything."

"OK but be careful. My machine is a bit different from the ones at school."

"You're telling me! Wow, this thing is ancient! Does it plug in or do you have to pedal it?"


Example two:

"Mum, did you watch this program when you were my age?"

"No darling. It wasn't around then."

"Oh. What did you watch?"

"Whatever my parents wanted to watch because we only had one TV."

"Oh. Were you guys like poor or something?"

"No darling. We just had one lounge room and that's where the TV was."

"One lounge room and one TV? I'm so glad I didn't live in the olden days!"


Example three:

"Mum did you have electricity when you were little or did you have to use candles for lights and go to bed when it got dark?"

"Yes we had electricity and we only used candles when it wasn't working .. same as we do now."

"Wow! Electricity really has been around for a long time hasn't it?"


After delivering these little gems, he usually looks at me with an innocent face before registering my reaction, then running for the relative safety of his room before I come over all weak and decrepit and start demanding my dinner at 4 o'clock in the afternoon with "it had better be mushed up so my poor old teeth can take it sonny boy" added for good measure.

Now I know why my mother always looked so upset when I asked her about what type of dinosaur she rode to school.

Kids .. gotta love 'em (I think it's a law!)

As you may have gathered ..

... I like taking photos of sunsets.

This one was taken at Glenelg Beach in South Australia on the 20th of August, 2007. It was week three of our "Big Trip" across the country and back again, and we were lucky enough to get this beautiful sunset on our last day in SA.

The things you find out afterwards...

Alex loved Thomas the Tank Engine when he was smaller and would often play with them for hours. If he wasn't playing with his own trains, he would be watching the videos/DVDs over and over again. He was never really interested in any other children's characters for long and would always come back to Thomas especially when upset about something. His Thomas trains were kind of a security blanket for him.

I have only just found out today (only about 8 years after the fact) that a fascination with Thomas (bordering on an obsession) is very common in children with Autism Spectrum Disorder. I found some information on this site about this interesting fact.

The things you don't realise until much later!

Another version of circles

I was playing and being silly with Andrew when he stopped and very seriously asked me what language was I speaking. It wasn't really any language, just silly noises, but I told him I was being the Chef from the Muppets. "Who? From where?" Oh you poor deprived child you!

As a result, we have spent the last 25 minutes watching different clips from the Muppet Show on youtube. This was Andrew's favourite:



The circles part comes in here: my sister and I used to watch this show every chance we could and now my kids want me to get the DVDs so they can watch it too! Everything old is new again. (It's still funny to me but probably only because it was funny then).

I love youtube! Now I'm off to look for "Pigs in Space!"

SS Blog Challenge #22

"In honour of Father's Day and since mine has been on my mind of late: tell me, what is the greatest lesson you ever learned from your father?"

Even though Father's Day over here in Australia isn't until September, I decided to do this challenge anyway.

My Dad taught me so many things it's really hard to pick just one.
He was forever telling me to:

• "Have confidence and just walk into the room like you own it."
• "If you believe in yourself, everyone else will too."
• "You never know what you can do until you try."
• "You never fail until you stop trying."

And my personal favourite:

• "The impossible takes a little longer."

But as great as all those things were, the most important thing he taught me was to take care of those you love and make sure you tell them you love them before it's too late.

He was the person we could always turn to in times of need or pain but also in times of joy. Dad would help us fix the problems or be happy for us. He was a rather no nonsense man who wasn't prone to sharing his feelings easily.

In the week before his death, he was more concerned about how my Mum was going to cope than his own pain. He called my sister and I into his hospice room and asked us to take care of each other and Mum. It was only when he was close to death that he realised how much my sister and I needed to hear him tell us in words how much he loved us. He had always shown his love by doing things for us and I know now that that was just his way of expressing himself but it was heartwarming to hear the actual words. "I love you and I'm proud of you and the person you've become."

So don't leave it until the last minute. Tell those near and dear to you that you love them and do it often .. even when the kids are embarrassed by it, they secretly take it to heart and keep it there. What better gift to give your child?

Easter and my Dad

I had often wondered how the date of Easter was worked out and knew it had something to do with the lunar cycles, so I finally googled it and found this:

Prior to A.D. 325, Easter was variously celebrated on different days of the week, including Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. In that year, the Council of Nicaea was convened by emperor Constantine. It issued the Easter Rule which states that Easter shall be celebrated on the first Sunday that occurs after the first full moon on or after the vernal equinox. However, a caveat must be introduced here. The "full moon" in the rule is the ecclesiastical full moon, which is defined as the fourteenth day of a tabular lunation, where day 1 corresponds to the ecclesiastical New Moon. It does not always occur on the same date as the astronomical full moon. The ecclesiastical "vernal equinox" is always on March 21. Therefore, Easter must be celebrated on a Sunday between the dates of March 22 and April 25. (http://wilstar.com/holidays/easter.htm)

So now you all know too .. if you didn't already!

My dad always told me that in the northern hemisphere, specifically England, the vernal equinox is regarded as the first day of spring. He said he had only ever remembered that fact from school because the 21st of March just happened to be his birthday!

Speaking of my dad, last Friday would have been his 62nd birthday. I still can't believe that it's been almost 8 years since he died. He was a really wonderful human being and an even better father. I have so much to thank him for and continue to do so, even though he's not physically here with me. He was always there for us, not necessarily in the way we wanted (grounded for life rings a few bells), but now that I'm a parent myself, I can understand almost everything he went through. I am so grateful he chose Mum and I to spend his life with and that he gave me my little sister who is so like him at times, it's scary.

I know he wasn't perfect .. no-one ever is .. but everything he did came from love and wanting to help us grow to make the right decisions for ourselves. He certainly didn't agree with some of them, but he was able to admit when he was wrong and we were right. Not straight away mind you .. it often took a while, but it would happen. In those cases when we were wrong and he was right, I don't think I ever heard him say "I told you so" or "it serves you right". He would just be there on the sidelines waiting to help if we wanted or needed him to.

I really miss just talking to him. We could talk about almost anything. I am very much like him in that I can converse on just about any topic without appearing a fool, but he had the whole thing down pat. He could walk into any room and fit right in, whether it was high society or blue collar. I always admired him for that and his ability to put people at ease.

I'm not 100% sure in what I believe happens to us after we die, but I like to think that wherever he's ended up, be it heaven or as sub-atomic particles floating in the ether, that he's watching over us and that he's proud of himself and the example he set us.

I miss you so much Dad and so do your boys. Love you.

Looking back ...

The SS Blog challenge (below) made me think a lot more about my childhood and I have realised that I had a really good one.

We moved a lot and, at the time, that was hard to deal with but it helped me become more accepting of different cultures than I would have been if we'd stayed in one place. It's a shame I don't remember more of the earliest years in Singapore and England but I have great memories of the times in Fiji and Hawaii.

I would love to go back to Fiji some day, hopefully soon, but I know it won't be the same. A lot of the places we lived aren't there anymore and we all know how time enhances some memories to make them seem grander than they really are.

Maybe I'll just hang on to my versions of the memories instead ...

SS blog challenge #3

"When the phone is ringing, the doorbell is going off, kids are yelling, laundry is overwhelming and dinner has burned and you sit down to a cup of tea, where do you let your mind go?"

Somewhere .. anywhere .. far, far away!

Seriously though, I don't seem to have a particular "happy place", more like happy times.

The ones I've been thinking about the most lately is the family holidays we had at the Paradise Point Motel in Fiji, when I was about 6 years old. It was right on the beach and they had a great pool with a log across it, that I used to walk across pretending I was some jungle explorer, while Dad used to be the crocodile in the water trying to pull me in. There was a juke box just outside the reception area that took 5c pieces and I spent almost all of my 50c pocket money playing the Kiss song "I was made for loving you baby". Probably not the best song for a 6 year old to be listening to but oh well! Everytime I hear that song, I'm transported back there.

Overall, I think I just go to a "place" where things were easier. I probably go back to times spent in Fiji as a child more than anywhere else, but I also go back to teenage years with the flush of first love, first real kiss and no real responsibilities.