Being a sheep ...

... and following along with the flock doing a "quick" 2013 round up.

January:

• Still (quietly) patting myself on the back for winning Austral Bricks WA Employee of the Year for 2012.  The fact that I managed to (unintentionally) insult the Managing Director and keep my job apparently got me more points than all the work I did, but I'll take the win (and the $1500 Flight Centre voucher .. woohoo!  I can see a nice holiday in my future).
• Actually went out quad bike riding with the boys (all four of them) and didn't kill myself, break anything or hurt anyone else .. go me!
• Celebrated Alex's friend Chris' 18th birthday at Sizzler's in Kelmscott.
• Managed to get some more of the backyard finished and made some quirky crafty items for my upcoming birthday.  Bowls made from old records anyone?

February:

• Finally got the backyard landscaping guy to come back and finish it.
• Turned 40 ... aaaargghh!!  Celebrated with a 70's themed birthday party and had a great time.
• My 'baby' boy, Brad, turned 14!  Where is the time going??

March:

• Painted the 'spare' room for Mum to move into while she builds her new house.
• Tried my hand at fruit and vege gardening...

April:

• Let Alex drive us up to Ikea for a day out only to have his car die on the Cedric St off-ramp .. thank God for RAC road patrol! $250 for a new battery later, we were able to get his car going again just in time to go home.
• Celebrated Debbie's 50th birthday with high tea at Little Nich's Cafe.  Nice food, dribbly teapots and lovely company .. great day!!
• Clare came over to have a ride on the scooter to practise for her trip to Greece.  
• Commiserated with Deb over her baby, Amy, turning 16.

May:

• Had an early Mother's Day celebration with Mum, Clare, Rich and my tribe at the Mundijong Pub.  Peter and Richard went for a country motorbike ride first and met us there.
• Took Andrew and Debbie to see Cirque Du Soleil's OVO show.  Fantastic night out except for the bucketing down rain :-(
• Mum moved in.
• Went to Tasmania for our 20th wedding anniversary with no kids and using the voucher I won. Awesome but tiring (not for the reason you think ... get your mind out of the gutter!)
• Had another Mother's Day celebration when we got back from Tassie.  Love, hugs and presents .. yay!
• My middle baby, Drew, turned 16.  He booked himself in for his learner's test and passed first time ... go Drew!!

June:

• Ate the first apple from the Pinkabelle tree.  
• Got a wild idea to rip my wedding dress apart and use (what I thought was a hug amount of) fabric for other purposes. (Didn't get very far with that .. there was nowhere near as much silk in the skirt as I thought there was ..oh well).  Made Brad pose for photos in the bodice of the dress, mean mummy that I am!
• Painted Drew's bedroom wall with "racing stripes".  He likes it even if no-one else does!!

July:

• Had to race Xena to the vet in the middle of the night once we worked out that she had eaten almost a whole box of dark chocolate.  Got home at 2am and had to go back to pick her up at 8am to avoid paying another day's worth of ICU charges.  
• Went to Sydney for a work trip ... on the same day that I had raced Xena to the vet.  Couldn't sleep on plane so had an early night when I got there.  Found out that the company hadn't paid for the accommodation in advance so got hit with a huge bill on check out.  Thank goodness for 'secret stash' money...
• Took another trip to Ikea and found some inspiration for what to do on the long wall in the family room.  Besta bookshelves are my new best friend ... I think.

August:

• Had a night at the shed, just Peter and I (despite vowing not to go .. a girl can change her mind!)
• Drew had his first official driving school driving lesson.
• Finally got floor coverings in the bedrooms .. spotted gum floorboards.

September:

• My first 'little baby', Alex turned 18 and somehow became 6'1" tall ... waaahhhh!!  j/k .. so proud of him for the hurdles he's overcome and the wonderful young man he is.  Love you son!
• Had a belated Father's Day (as it was on Alex's birthday .. how rude!)
• Drew bought his first car, a Longreach Falcon ute, which was brought home on the Sunday afternoon and then stolen in the early hours of the Thursday afternoon.  Fire brigade found it on fire and reported it to police.  By the time the Police got there, it had been stolen again and still hasn't been recovered.  Thank goodness for insurance!
• Did some more crafty/practical projects that I will slowly be updating over the next couple of weeks .. I promise!

October:

• Took a week off work during school holidays and spent some time with my growing-way-too-quick boys.
• Thought about going to the Perth Royal Show(for about an hour), regained my sanity and stayed home instead.  Saved amount of money equivalent to the GDP of a small African nation.

November:

• Drew got his official Certificate II in light automotive servicing ..well done!
• Took yet another trip to Ikea .. just because.
• Got the windows tinted in our bedroom, the home theatre (or as I call it, the lounge room), the family room and Alex's bedroom.  Makes a huge difference to the amount of heat coming in from outside.
• Peter bought a new bigger motorbike.  Continued to hassle me about getting my bike licence ...

December:

• Put up the tree with the boys with minimal grumbling (from me!)
• Drew picked up his new car .. 1999 Lantra with very low km's for it's age.
• Made three Pepparkaka Hus kits from Ikea (otherwise known as gingerbread houses for English speakers).  Used an entire year's worth of lollies and royal icing between the three .. yum!!
• Had Christmas breakfast at home, lunch at Mark and Bec's and home again for dinner.
• Quiet day at home on Boxing Day, then out for dinner with Nonnie and Clare down in Shoalwater.
• For Peter's 47th birthday my lovely boss let me take half a day off so we had lunch at Hog's Breath in Kelmscott, then home for presents.  Managed to surprise him with the Springsteen tickets I'd bought back in September as well as the usual littler presents from the boys.
• Quiet New Year's at home with the boys (Mum went out .. has a better social life then me!).  Managed to see in the New Year, then slept like a log until 9am.

So there you go, a whole year in a rather large nutshell.  Here's hoping I can get my shit together slightly more organised this year and manage to post some of the happenings as (or soon after) they happen.

 A girl's got to have dreams ... right? 

Now I know where Brad gets his warped sense of humour from ...

Well, actually I already knew but it was just confirmed once and for all.

Peter, Drew and I were sitting watching Better Homes and Gardens on Friday night when a segment came on about some flowers that look like carnations but aren't (some sort of relative to them though).

As the presenter was extolling the virtues of this plant with very pink flowers, Peter pipes up with "Did you know there's no such thing as a pink carnation?"

I was just about to reply with something along the lines of "Of course there is!" when Drew asked "Why?"

Peter's response?

"Because every nation has many different coloured cars."

Cue groans here!

Boxes, boxes, everywhere ...

Woohoo!! The buyers have finally had their finance approved (after a week's extension) so it's official ... we've sold the house! I have also managed to find a rental house and been approved for that too. Now I'm just madly packing everything that stands still long enough, which may be Peter if today is anything like yesterday.

For those whose husbands/partners aren't into motor racing, lucky you! It's Bathurst weekend when the V8 Supercars go round and round and round 161 times. However, that's not the most mind numbing part. That would be reserved for the endless discussions about the merits of this tyre versus that one, who was 0.001 of a second in front of or behind who, how long it took to build this car, how much it cost to build that car and we can't forget the endless repeating of the positions/times/leaderboard throughout the whole thing.

It does have benefits though ... Peter will agree to almost anything to get me to move out of the way of the TV! And apparently it's very educational though I'm not sure I want Drew to know just what these are supposed to be educating him about ...

(Is it just me or do most of these girls look constipated or like they're having some kind of fit?)

I'm sitting here listening to the occasional outburst whenever someone overtakes someone else and the running commentary from Pete, explaining all the minuscule details to the only one of the boys who is vaguely interested (Drew). I think they're both just waiting for the inevitable bingles and crashes that are bound to occur in a race of this length. That's when it really starts to sound interesting.

Bradley came into the study about three minutes ago and I sent him off to say good morning to his father with the instruction to stay and watch the car racing with him. Brad's response was "If I have to watch the car racing, I may as well go back to bed." Good to see one of my children has some sense!

Seriously though, it's one weekend a year and Pete enjoys watching it. He works pretty damn hard the rest of the time so I don't begrudge him this. It's heaps better than listening to, or worse, actually watching test cricket so I'm immensely grateful that hasn't started yet!

Now I'm off to pack some more boxes and try to work out why I thought it was such a good idea to buy so much Tupperware ....

Out of the mouths of babes ...

Bradley came down to my room this morning and said to me through the ensuite door, very seriously, "Mum, we need to replace Dad."

Curious as to the reason behind this sudden pronouncement, I asked him why.

His equally serious response?

"Because he's a pre-1980's gas appliance."

Love it!

(There's a campaign on TV at the moment telling people they have to replace their pre-1980's gas appliances due to some upcoming changes to the gas supply. He's just taken that idea and run with it. Love the way his mind works!)

Am I being unreasonable?

I have been stewing on this overnight and most of this morning and I need to know if I am being unreasonable in expecting my husband to take our children shopping to get me, their mother, a birthday present?

He has never been big on the whole present giving thing .. he says he never knows what to get me, which is a totally different issue .. but couldn't he have at least taken the boys out and let them pick something little or encouraged them to make something from the multitude of options available in the house? The usual excuse of 'I didn't have time to go to the shops' really doesn't ring true as he took two extra days off work this time (without telling me first) so that he would be home for my birthday.

Now I do appreciate that he made arrangements to do that, but given that he dislikes where he is working at the moment and doesn't want to be there anyway, and he has even admitted that it was convenient for him to stay home, it feels like he did that for his benefit, not mine. Yes, we did go out for lunch at the local food court (my choice), but that is something we do almost every time he is home. Yes, I was the one who didn't really want to go see a movie, because there is nothing on at the moment that really appealed as a must-see (for me or him).

At the risk of sounding materialistic and greedy, my birthday is one of the few times times a year I expect some sort of present to be purchased/made, wrapped in something other than newspaper and given to me with a smile. I would have loved a home-made cake decorated by the boys, a coupon book of things they would do without me having to nag, a magazine served up with a cup of tea or coffee or something along those lines. He said several times that he was planning on taking the boys out after school but something else always seemed to come up. Yes money is tight at the moment, but anything would have been nice! To receive nothing at all and to then have to remind two of the boys that it was even my birthday, cut a neat little chunk out of my heart.

I think what it comes down to for me, is that it really hurts that they think so little of me and all I do for them all. Everyone likes to be appreciated and this feels like they couldn't even be bothered to exert the effort to give me a slap in the face. He thinks I am 'pissed off' at him, which I suppose I am, but the overwhelming feeling at the moment is hurt and disappointment, which I have verbalised but I can't even look him in the face at the moment. He had gone back to work this morning before I got back from dropping the kids off at school and running a couple of short errands, so it has just been left hanging.

Anyway, back to the original question .. do you think I'm being unreasonable?

Family news from the past week ..

I survived the '12th birthday movie night sleepover party' (obviously!) without too much damage. Andrew had a great birthday and a great party, even if he did come down to the lounge room and sit with me for a while because "they're all soooo noisy that I have a headache!" and that was with only three extra boys in the house.

After shifting some furniture in Alex's bedroom, I discovered our shower is leaking into his wall again., so now we're up for the cost of fixing that. Luckily, Peter was in the mood to fix it properly by re-tiling the whole shower instead of just patching it, so now I get to go pick out new tiles and try to arrange a reasonable quote for the labour involved.

I also managed to get him to agree to getting an electrician in to fix the dodgy front light and install another one. I thought I was on a roll until I figured out why he was being so reasonable ...
I bought food for the family on the weekend.

This is what Peter bought on the weekend ..


He's been wanting another bike for a while and now that we actually have a car (or three!) to transport the kids in, I don't really have a problem with him having it. He is careful, always wears the right protective gear and deserves some fun. The look on his face when he got off after riding it home was priceless. His grin nearly split his face in half! For those who want the details it's a Kawasaki Vulcan VN800 Cruiser. A cruiser is much better for a ride in the country on a fine afternoon than a sports bike. Only problem is that with his matt black helmet, now he really looks like a bikie.

Andrew went off to his year 7 camp on Monday. This will be the longest he's been away from home without one of us there with him. He's my little stress head, so he was a bit worried about the whole thing but found a kindred spirit in one of the kids who came to his birthday party, Nik, who was a bit concerned as well. They agreed to sit together on the bus for the 5 hour trip to Albany and help each other out. I think they'll both be so busy, they won't have time to feel homesick but it's good to know someone has his back. Andrew even deigned to give me a hug good-bye, after looking around and checking out what the other boys were doing of course!

Alex is in trouble again for not handing in homework that I know he's done at least part of. I have told his teachers that I refuse to put my entire life on hold to stand over him for hours on end, but some of them still don't seem to realise that getting him to think in abstract terms is like trying to milk a bull .. now matter how long and hard you try, it just isn't going to work! Mind you, the communication between the teachers and myself has improved greatly from last year so at least I'm able to suggest alternatives to tasks that are going to be too far outside the realms of reasonable expectation. I know you shouldn't wish your life, or your child's life, away but I can't wait until high school is over!!

Bradley has been wandering the house like a little lost soul without Andrew here. Apparently it's no fun to play the Wii by himself so the dog is getting a lot of extra attention and loving it!

Now I'm off to contact some more tilers so I can try to work out if the first quote is good, bad or indifferent. Wish me luck ...

Welcome to our new Country Estate ..

.. otherwise known as 'How's the serenity?' (Which movie is that from .. anyone?)

Despite the current economic downturn, we have decided to mortgage ourselves to the hilt (NOT!) to be able to purchase this 'massive' property with many, many features. So many features, in fact, I had to label the photographs just so you wouldn't get confused.

Now for those of you who are not familiar with the metric measurement system, 1 hectare or 10,000 sqm, is roughly equal to 2.5 acres. Therefore class, 1.4492 hectares is roughly equal to 3.6 acres. Thus endeth the maths lesson for today because now my head hurts!

I realise that many of you would not think that this is 'massive' , but considering that it is 14.5 times the size of our suburban block and roughly 25-30 times the size of current blocks for sale, I feel it is massive enough for a country retreat/doghouse for Peter/place to bury the children when they misbehave.

Seriously though, it is a great compromise between moving to the country and staying here. I get to live here and holiday there and Peter has some red dirt he can call his own. When you also consider that Peter was looking at blocks in excess of 150 acres, while I was looking at downsizing the one we have in Perth, this compromise is looking even better.

It's only 2.5 hours drive from home on good roads .. no off-roading required .. and is a dry block with no swampy bits. We will be building a 'shack' on it with all the mod cons .. running water, plumbing, some form of electricity .. and will probably use it every second time Pete is home. (That part is still under negotiation .. lol!)

We took the dog with us when we went up to look at the block last weekend and he was as happy as a pig in mud .. of which there wasn't any .. mud, that is .. luckily for Pete. This is him fast asleep on the backseat of the car on the way home ...

Tres elegant, puppy! Wonder if he's dreaming about all those rabbits he could smell?

He loves me .. he loves me not ..

He loves me!!

Peter arranged for these flowers to be delivered on our anniversary on Friday. Aren't they purdy?
I don't often get flowers so it's a wonderful surprise especially considering that he would have had to think ahead and organise them before going back up to work. Forethought, planning and consideration .. much sexier than rock-hard abs!!

Oh my!

What big ears you have!

All the better to hear you with my dear!

What a lot of teeth you have!

All the better to eat you with my dear!

What a strange tongue you have! Is it supposed to do that?

Yes! Yes it is. Look my brother has one just like it.

But what about your other brother?

Oh, he's inherited Dad's genes. They have very strange tongues indeed! Not a sideways curl in sight.

(This all started because Bradley came to me and said"Look what I can do Mum!" Then they all had to get in on the act. I'm so proud!!)

Moving worries ... again!

I know you're probably all sticking your hands over your ears .. I mean your eyes .. and yelling "no more with the talk about moving already!" but 'the elephant in the corner of the room' just won't go away. (I'm still not moving to Red Dirt Central though!)

Little bit of background: Our block was originally part of a bigger block that had a church and our house on it. The church wanted to amalgamate parishes (and make some money) so they subdivided the bigger block into two; one large block (3000sqm) with the building that was a church and one smaller block (1000sqm) with our house on it. It was originally an almost square block, but due to regulations about lot sizes for public buildings, both blocks ended up being odd shapes.

The building next door is currently being used as a daycare centre and the owner has decided to sell it to fund another development project he has in the works. As a result, it's now up for auction at the end of this month. Due to the current trend of building as many units on one block as possible and therefore making a huge profit, the agent selling next door asked if we would be willing to sell our house to whoever wins the auction. He then went on to state he has several very interested parties so the chances of us selling are fairly high.

Now I have to admit, as much as I love the idea of living next to a major construction site, on a main road, on a block that only has one access point that is often blocked due to idiots and their insane parking habits, I think I would rather move. (In case you hadn't gathered, this is where the talk of moving starts again. Just so you know and can run screaming from the computer.)

After another brief conversation with Peter about moving, we still haven't come any closer to an acceptable-to-both-parties compromise. He's still looking at places about 2 to 2.5 hours drive away, in prime red dirt country, whereas I'm looking at something a lot closer to where we are now so the boys can stay in the school they're in. Yes, it's more expensive now but it will be worth a lot more in the long run, especially if things keep expanding the way they are now. (And no, I am not referring to my butt and its nasty habit of expanding. I meant the edges of the suburban sprawl, so be nice!)

I really think I should be looking at rooms in the local mental hospital at the rate I'm going. I wonder if they do discounts for advance bookings?

Therapy

After another round of fruitless, disheartening discussion, I needed something to do. I wandered around the house for a while trying to decide which project to tackle and finally decided on weeding down the laundry side of the house.

Weeding is great therapy. You can vent all your frustrations on the weeds, you're getting exercise, you're outdoors getting fresh air and sunshine and there's a visible result when you decide you've had enough.

6 wheelbarrows full of weeds later, the laundry gardens are looking a lot better. I am thoroughly sore and tired but at least I did something instead of eating! Now I might actually try to scrap something. (Only 'cos I need to sit down for a while!!)

Circles

That's what we are talking in .. circles!

He's home this weekend but is out today all day at a dirt drags race meet. I tried talking to him last night but it's going nowhere. Still a stalemate.

Oh well, there's always tomorrow!

Negotiations have begun...

and they should be interesting!

I finally managed to talk to Pete tonight. Remember what I said about how he probably thinks that if he waits long enough I'll change my mind? I was right. He was thinking that. But after I made it perfectly clear that I wasn't going to, he said that he wasn't going to let me talk him out of it either.

So the short version of the long story is that he's investigating further details of the block with a view to buying it as a "getaway". I don't have a problem with that provided he doesn't stay at the "getaway" more than he's home. Financially we can probably afford to buy it so long as we don't have to build a house on it straight away. I think he said something about having four years to build a house but that's one of the details he's looking into.

So now it's just a waiting game. Que sera, sera.

Another update

We have come to a stalemate.

He hates the city and I won't move to the country so apparently now he has to "do some thinking". I think he's hoping that if he leaves it long enough that I'll change my mind. I've told him I won't, but he's stubborn like that.

Anyway, the screen is getting blurrier by the second so I'm off to try and get some sleep.

Differences Part 2

Warning: another post full of rambling thoughts that aren't at all happy!

Apparently I have been in the dark for most of our 15 year marriage.

Apparently he has always wanted to move to the country. He just didn't push it before now because he thought he might upset me or that it would end up coming between us.

He was right. This is probably, no not probably, it is the biggest difference so far. Hiding something as fundamental as where you want to live for the rest of your life is a big deal, even if it was done with the best intentions.

Ok, a bit of perspective is obviously needed here (for me, not you guys!):

1. He hasn't had an affair,
2. He's not dying or seriously ill,
3. He's not planning on leaving me,
4. He's not an axe murderer (yet! Though I may drive him to it .. lol)
5. He actually asked me instead of telling me,
6. He has said that he will respect my decision (for a couple of months or until he finds somewhere else to hassle me about. His words, not mine).

Ultimately though, it is my decision and it's going to affect the whole family. I have wondered if I'm being selfish not wanting to go that far outside everything I know. I didn't want to just say no without giving it some serious thought because I didn't want to hurt his feelings. But after some serious thought and some rather deep soul-searching, I just can't do this at this stage of my/our lives. Given my fragile mental state at the best of times, I honestly can't see how removing all my support network is going to be better for me, our children or our marriage.

So, in a nutshell, I hope this doesn't cost me my marriage but I'm not moving ...

Differences

Warning: whinge fest and pity party follows. Proceed at your own risk!

I knew when I married him that we had things in common and things we differ on. I should have known that it was the things we differ on that would make the most difference.

I am a city girl. I thought he was a city boy, because he sure used to be, but I was apparently wrong. He has a need to move to the country and to take us all with him. I suppose I should be grateful that he wants to take us with him but I'm having a hard time appreciating that particular silver lining right now. He's even made a concession to my "moving to a country town" phobia by picking a "big" town. It has a supermarket, a coffee shop and, to quote him, "it even has a hairdresser".

I mean no offense to people who live in country towns but it's just not my scene. I'm quite comfortable here in suburbia on my own little patch of land with everything I want and need close by. Maybe it's just a matter of shifting my view of what I want and need but I like it here! (insert stamping foot and pouting lip).

Besides, I'm sure I'm allergic to red dust. He comes home covered in it every third week and I sneeze for days. (It always sounds better to say that I'm allergic to the dust because the only other option is that I'm allergic to him!) He knows that I sneeze for days yet he wants me to buy 5 acres of red dust and build a house on it and can't understand why I'm not jumping at the chance.

I realise that the world isn't all about me (shock horror!) and that marriage is a partnership with numerous compromises, but I don't wanna move!!! He won't make us move but I know he'd be happier if we did.

I've told him I'll think about it but that I refuse to let him guilt me into it. Stay tuned ....